I have been trying to write for days about the leap of faith I have taken. Words and thoughts keep circling in my head, but will not land in a place that I can pull a thread of wisdom from.
Enter Mama Medicine. I have been following this wise woman via her newsletters and social media for a while now, and I am always able to take something away from her teachings.
Her latest newsletter, (you can find her here http://www.mamamedicine.nyc/ )
Spoke about the time of Mercury in Retrograde being the Chrysalis Phase.
We start out in life as a Caterpillar, and could go on living in simplicity as said Caterpillar- knowing that change will rarely occur, and growth is not something that even exists. OR we can go into Chrysalis- we can enter the unknown and begin the stages of transformation and evolution that will forever alter the course of our lives.
So, this leap of faith….. with the full support of my incredible husband, I made the decision to leave my full time job in the Insurance Industry, so that I am able to focus on growing my Reiki Healing and Intuitive Tarot Business. The other HUGE factor in making this decision was that in leaving, I would be able to spend much more time with my son Flynn- something he and I desperately needed.
Even though leaving my co-workers, many of whom had become good friends over the years was difficult, I knew with every bone in my body that I was making the right decision. I was able to leave with grace and positivity, and of my own power. I am very grateful to have a wonderful relationship with my former managers, and a sturdy bridge still stands there.
What I did not expect AT ALL, was this period of transition after the act of leaving. I naively thought that the action of leaving would magically transform me into the majestic butterfly I longed to be. (Please note my sarcasm here, although some of you may know me enough to take it at face value.)
I now know that I have entered into Chrysalis, and have only just begun. Being home with Flynn and navigating through promoting my business has been extremely challenging. But after reading Mama Medicine’s writing- I am not afraid of the unknown. I understand that this time is a gift- one of rest, resilience, and creation.
I know that one day, I will emerge from the Chrysalis into The Butterfly. But I am no longer solely focused on this end result. Living a sober life, and becoming a mother have taught me that we must live for the present, because we have no way of knowing what the next day will bring.
I will embrace this period of transition and transformation, and honor the work that is necessary to weave my wings. And once those wings are strong enough, and stable enough, only then, will I think of spreading them open…. TO FLY.